- You go first, gold-digger! - No, you first
- Gold-digger first! - Ok then, buddy! One Doner
Me too, 2 Doner's...
Sorry there's only one left...
Hey guys...
no need to fight
at King of Kebab there are other things than Doner.
It's great, isn't it...
At KING of KEBAB in Schanze we serve Doner 24 hours non stop!
Salads, Mezes and the best Tripe Soup in town!
Also Pidehs and Turkish Pizzas, The most spicy kind...
Spicier than spicy, man
KING of KEBAB makes me feel so sexy
KING of KEBAB
...the two handful Doner.
Uncle, it's just the way you want it.
It's fast, it's funny... Worth every cent!
So, it's worth every cent...
Worth every cent, eh?
This is the worst thing I ever saw!
Believe me, I saw many awful things. Galatasaray's 74/75 season match...
89th minute, Hikmet...
first back, second back
went past everyone... but kicked the ball out!
This... is worse than that, actually CRAP!
- So, you didn't like it? - This is a slaughterhouse ad!
"Are you planning a massacre?" "Do you need Turks with swords!"
"Come to KING of KEBAB!" - You're exaggerating, uncle.
Uncle? Don't call me uncle! You don't have an uncle!
I want my money back, damn it. - Uncle, I swear, the boys...
Don't call me uncle, or... - Come on let's go. - Why?
I'll make mince meat out of you. - It's better than this.
- But the special effects were great, right? - I don't want to see you.
- Come on... - He doesn't mean that. - I REALLY MEAN IT!!
I liked the talking severed head, Just like the singing,
tax filing sports shoes in my dreams
Three months of work for nothing!
Because you're nuts.
The only nuts that can create such an ad.
My nuts... - And you're the only woman that can turn me on with Doner.
- Isn't it quite exaggerated? - Absolutely.
- Do you have to go? - Any plans for tonight?
- Should I cook for my great director? - Yeah... - See you then.
"Autumn depressions" or "How Mr. X is scared of the government"
Great title!
- What's up? - Yes...
Ok, let's start...
I want to make the first German Kung-Fu movie, ok?
We have lot's of movies, Action movies, Porno movies, but Kung Fu movies...
is the king of the movies. Only the big guys can make them.
No ones done it in Germany. We could be the first!
I swear, people are waiting for this. They ask me on the streets.
Hey, Ibo... When are you making the first German Kung Fu movie?
Shall I start from the beginning?
Please...
Our hero walks into a shop to buy shorts and t-shirts, anyway...
Suddenly 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 people attack him an incredible fight breaks out...
...and our hero... - Why?
Why what?
Why are they fighting?
What difference does it make? What's important is coming up...
The first guy staring at our hero with destroying looks in his eyes
our hero kicks him in the nuts, he's twisting on the floor...
Second guy is hanging in the air and our hero throws a front double kick
the guys done, alright...
Speed goes on, breaking bones, buckets of blood...
Teeth flying in the air, front, back, teeth everywhere, alright?
Just like Bruce Lee is alive. Shaolin's 36th death cell...
...right next to your office.
You know what I'm saying?
Ah? A cup closed in my true love's hand?
Poison I see hath been his timeless end.
Oh, churl, drunk all and left no friendly drop. Were you not ashamed?
Romeo.
Didn't you leave a single drop, To help me after?
I will kiss thy lips, Haply some poison yet doth hang on them
to make me die with a restorative. Thy lips are warm.
How did it go? - Are you home tonight?
yes... NO, no...
Good
Titzi!
Are we rivals now?
Don't worry, they wouldn't take me anyway.
I don't have your body.
They won't take me either.
Come, night, Thou sober-suited matron all in black,
Hood my unmanned blood, bating in my cheeks,
till strange love grow bold,
Think true love acted simple modesty.
Come, Night, come, Romeo,
Come, Night, come, Romeo...
KING of KEBAB
...the two handful Doner.
Hey, man
three portions of tripe soup is not enough for us.
Didn't I tell you? You're going to go broke because of this tripe soup.
They're going to turn you into a junkie.
Then you're going to go, "hey man, please, another sip of tripe soup"
"just another tea-spoonful"
Hey, come in brother, we just popped the air bag, come on...
Why isn't KING of KEBAB on our list?
He has to pay, too...
A frightened cook serves bad food... - Works for my bitch
Hey, did you see it? - What?
There, behind us...
there were hundreds of people a second ago. - Where?
Over there...
They were real right? Or did they come from another dimension?
- They were real man. - Yeah, yeah...
Pussy!
Hey, Ibo...
Hey, Sifu...
Hey, look outside!
Sorry, sorry. - My mistake, it's ok.
What's going on in there? - Don't be so modest, Spielberg.
Come... come...
Ooo Ibrahim, pride of our family, the golden boy...
let me give you a hug.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is Ibrahim Sechmez!
The director of the ad!
He's a genius, and...
my nephew...
Hakan!
You work for Hurriyet,
Come on, take our photos!
Are you doing short films as well, or just commercials?
No, I just finished my first script. - What is it called?
"The death fist of yellow revenge" - oh...
Yes, this ad I made for my uncle was just a practice...
for the first German Kung Fu movie. - Exactly, I discovered him!
I'm 40 and the oldest in this suburb, mark my words!
Come here, you did a great job.
The Greek across the road can go to Lesbos to feed the gay goats...
YOU SEE THIS CLITORIS? err, Kirianis...
Damn it! - Uncle...
what's the matter?
What's not the matter!
Except this tavern, this area was like a desert.
All of a sudden, this fat, greasy nosed...
mustached barbarians came along.
and everyone’s eating dog meat stuffed in white bread!
If that was not enough...
my own son opened up an Arabian take-away.
Why?
Because, my son doesn't like meat. And I thought I had a Greek son.
Isn't it my will? I took him out, why not! - Come on uncle.
Don't get worked up, come on...
have a drink of Ouzo.
Thank you Stella.
Cheers.
I'm going to cut this out of your tips.
Something crazy happened, even a reporter was there.
You should have seen my uncle, "Ibrahim, my golden son"
He's gone nuts...
Is it nice? - Just nice? It tickles my taste buds, man.
Is it too spicy?
I love spicy.
What's in your fortune cookie?
I know it says; "Luck is coming out of your arse, man"
What's up, aren't you happy?
I am, I am...
Your happiness is my happiness...
Do you know the story of the man who finished his meal in a Chinese restaurant?
He opens his fortune cookie and it says; "It wasn't duck!"
Hah, I'm pregnant...
Great... - That was my cookie.
"You're going to be a father", wow...
Am I going to be a father?
Do you want to?
I don't know, to be honest I'm too young to have a child.
I'm a child myself - I'm a child myself, too, Ibo!
Hello... I won't be a second...
Women are more advanced then men. - What kind of shit is that?
What? Am I responsible now? - You don't know?
What do you mean? I've been practicing for weeks.
I'm having nightmares, I'm at the audition and can't say a word.
It's not going to happen anyway. 'Cause I'm not going to go.
I'm off...
Everything ok? - Yeah, absolutely.
If I don't want the baby and you don't... - I want the baby!
But you just said you didn't... - Shit, I don't know, but I want it.
Ok, Shit, you don't know but you want it. - You're great support, Ibo!
What am I supposed to do if you don't know what you want?
I want it, get it? - I'm just saying let's not rush.
I WANT IT! - I got that!
Oh, god...
What?
That's my son.
My lion! Call Turkey and tell everyone,
Ibo is on Hurriyet news paper here.
Will you take me to the Oscar ceremony?
You remember daughter of Burhan from Adana?
Yeah?
- Damn! - Father! Father!
The girl wants to meet you.
What's wrong with you?
Dad... - What?
You're going to be grandpa, you grandma...
Ayla, you aunty... - Great!
Titzi is pregnant.
WHAT?
What have I been telling you since the day you were born?
Get a taxi license?
Mehmet! - What have I been telling you?
You can go around with a German girl,
You can go to bed with a German girl,
You can get out of bed with a German girl,
but, you must...
never, ever, ever...
get a German girl pregnant.
And what do you do? You go and do such shit!
My heart...
What shame!
Get out... Get out of my house!
GET OUT!
A German child
You'll never be "Baba". You'll always be "Papi"!
I'm not going to love them any less... - PAPI!
They will never speak your language!
I don't speak German with you, because I never speak German!
I've lived in Germany for 30 years!
Shit head, god damn you...
You're having a child with a faithless person!
A faithless bastard! - Father!
What did you say? Don't even try! No father, you don't have a father!
I'm going to exclude you from my will!
Shit! - Dad...
Shit...
Dad
Dad... - Don't touch me!
My son is having a child with a German! - God...
To me, you are what bread is to life...
a sweet rainfall to a dry earth
I live for you, in between... just like a churl that won't let go
Sometimes proud... sometimes angry...
with fear of time stealing my beauty, now thankful for my fortune
I wish everyone to believe in this miracle.
That bad?
Having a child from a German, nothing worse. - Hey!
According to may dad, man. - What about you?
I told yo - You don't know.
You don't know, either. - I do.
Oh yeah? why are you practicing then? I though you were not going to take the exam.
Just imagine if all the movies were cancelled as of today.
You can take the exam next year.
Really? Who’s going to take care of the baby? The exam committee?
- Then the following year... - Great, that was the right answer!
Turkish, what did I expect! I am light years ahead of you, in a different galaxy.
What was I supposed to say? - "Darling,
if you want to go to drama school, I'll take care of our baby".
How was I supposed to know? - Dude...
...I didn't know that either.
Hey Ibo, super star! - Hi Velid
Hey Lefty...
What's up? did you swallow a tofu ball? - I'm upset with you.
You know, that the trend these days. - Ibo, tea?
Yes please.
Any reason? - Your propaganda for flesh.
After you've killed the last animal...
after mad cow has rotten your brains, then you'll understand...
that you don't eat flesh. - That lamb chop yesterday was so tasty.
If you say another word, you're fired. - Fascist.
Ibo, you look very pale.
Titzi is pregnant.
No way! - Yes.
I don't believe it! - I said the same thing! - Super
We have to celebrate. I'll get champagne from Aldi.
You animal...
Wow! - What's there to "Wow"?
"What's there to Wow"?
God created a worm like you to make a miracle.
Yeah, nappies full of shit, sleepless nights tons of responsibilities, Wow...
You'd be good dad, dude, I wish you were my dad.
Your dad's Krianis. - He doesn't think so.
He want to give me up for adoption. - Mine, too. Took me out of his will.
Hey, I'm adopting you. - I'm adopting you, too.
Father - Father
Listen, Titzi is a great girl. She's a pearl, a Princess
Lefty! - You'll Make it. - Can crash at your for a few days?
My house is your house.
"I'm a warrior without a country. Dang-po Hon-lee"
Fast forward this shit, man.
"No, your country is in my heart"
Telephone? - Other room.
All this because of love.
0190 Sexy polish girls, young and lustful. - It's me Ibo. - Got it.
Titzi... - You're an asshole.
Finish him!
What do you want? - To hear you voice. - You heard it. - Hey Titzi!
What? - I wanted to talk about our situation, it's 5cm and growing.
Growing and growing, nothing can be done. Or is it? Anyway, and...
Titzi, please give me another chance. Will you? Please...
Ok, if you don't say anything for 5 seconds, means you forgive me.
One... Two...
Three...
Five
She didn't say a word!
Get a few frozen pizzas. You're eating very little. - Yep
Mama... - Have you seen him lately?
Who? - Your father.
Tell me... - No.
Please. - I haven't seen him.
You're lying! - You're getting upset again.
Good, have it your way.
Have you seen her? - Who?
This... This Sabine - Yes, last month, coincidence.
We were not going to talk about this any more.
I have to tell you something. - What did she say?
I'm pregnant
That pig is having my husbands baby? - No mum, me, I'm pregnant.
Oh god, Patrizia!
What "oh god"? I'm going to have a baby, so what?
Why isn't anyone happy? - Baby, is made to a man like a man.
All other men... - Not all are like my dad.
Is it Ibo's? - Naturally
What?
Have you ever seen a Turk pushing a pram?
What's this then?
I got a bargain.
Look, you push this, then you can take this off...
and you can carry the baby with this.
Super, isn't it?
Nice...
Goes well, too... Try it.
I believe you. - Push it.
Smooth.
I have to go to the book store.
Meet me at my place afterwards, ok? - Ok.
Hey, you forgot...
Ah, shit...
Hey, Pussy.
Hey, Ibo, what are you doing here?
I'm doing a research. - Aha, about what?
Jungle atmosphere
If the German Kung Fu doesn't make it, I'll do the first German Vietnam movie.
But the Germans didn't go to Vietnam.
Not yet, my friend, not yet...
I thought you were meeting Titzi. - I did.
And, everything ok? - Better than before.
What's that noise?
There's a pram there.
What a tone, man...
Oh, shit...
How do you make it quiet man? - How should I know?
Hey hey, quite, man... Shhh... - Maybe he's hungry?
Hey, calm down my friend.
Doesn't have teeth yet...
What am I going to do? - I don't know, I have to go - Don't you ever...
I have to put the food in the fridge.
You want milk, you get milk... Ibo Sechmez knows what babies want.
Good job man, I have to go now.
bye...
I'I smash your face, shit head
Darling, did he hurt you? - Let him drink his milk,
You bastard...
Velid!
Thank you.
I found the problem with the drink bottle.
You're angry Titzi, angry angry angry.
Ah, you are Ibo's friend. - Ibo's pregnant friend.
Would you like to come in? - No, I'm not coming in.
I'll tell you why, you don't want me in your house or in your family.
Take your hospitality and stick in somewhere. Why should I come in?
I'm not worthy of your family. - Hello Patrizia, come in, come in...
Some other time Mrs. Sechmez.
Yes, where was I? - Not worthy...
Yes, exactly, I'm not worthy.
But I don't care, I came to tell you...
How are you? - Hi sweety...
Come on in... - Not now honey, ok?
what a shame...
"to tell you..." - Yes, to tell you that,
you and your incompetent son don't deserve me...
But...
Good bye...
She was like a hurricane.
Should have invited her in. I did, Allah, Allah...
Just like girls from Trabzon.
She's pretty, too.
Not bad for a German.
Why is she so upset with Ibo? - Your son left her, that's why.
What was he supposed to do? - Mehmet!
What "Mehmet"? - Don't get me started.
The girl is all alone and expecting.
A man in my family can not leave a pregnant girl like that.
My family, too... - Then do something.
Don't tell me what to do.
Is it good Ibo? - Not as good as it used to be.
Did you hear what he said?
Not as good... - I told you uncle, with Gunur's meat it will be good again.
Gunur's meat? Do you know how expensive it is?
Just learn how to cook!
Did you think of something for the ad?
My head is full of thoughts. I'm upset with Titzi and dad.
I understand.
You can shoot whatever you want, I'll double your budget.
Anything? - How can I interfere with a genius?
Thanks to you, we are the biggest around here one more ad and we'll be in Hamburg.
What do you say?
Come, Romeo, come, wild Night! - No.
Endless blood? - Wild blood!
Wild blood. - Searching... like - Search I'm going to search for Romeo - No.
Help me, I can't make it.
You know what really upsets me? You do everything but birth control.
I give up, give me your belly and you take the exam.
More like Bruce Lee style.
Or, Jackie Chan style? - Jacky Chan is a poser.
Our man is Jet Lee, dude. do you remember "Black Mask"
that spin kick, eh? - It was something like this right?
Dad... - Don't call me "dad".
Tea? - No.
Do you want to eat something? - No.
Why did you leave your pregnant girlfriend?
Shame on you! - You kicked me out because of her.
I kicked you out, not my grand child.
Hang on, were you not the one excluding me from your will,
disowned me and kicked me out because I'm having a child from a German? - Yes.
I have a fight with Titzi because of that and now you're telling me off for that?
Yes.
Dad, that's completely nonsense.
You can't speak with your father like that...
...your father who is not your father anymore.
Donkey, son of a donkey.
These Turks are nuts.
Four weeks later...
8 Euros for a ticket? A bit too much just for ads.
Is the Greek spying now? Jealous of my ad campaign?
My kitchen does it's own advertisement! - Kitchen? You don't have a kitchen.
You heat up your food in the central heating room
At least I don't buy my meat from the dog hunters.
Don't you get it, if I ask him he'll say no.
His barbarian uncle would never let him.
But you two are friends, he'll listen to you.
Ela, come on son, just ask him.
What's your problem?
You took me off your will because I'm a vegetarian and run an Arabian take away...
then you come to my place, where you never set foot before
to satisfy your god damn greed.
Get out, Get lost
Be a little understanding my son... - GET OUT!
Think of my future! - GET OUT!
Ibo, how are you? - I'm good, all's well.
Thank you. How are you?
Good, good, thank you. So how are you?
I just said, good... Thank you
Do you need anything? - How do you mean?
Can I do anything for you?
I see, no thank you, I have everything.
thank you very much. - If you need anything just call me.
Ok, thank you very much.
Us Greeks and Turks, we have to join forces, don't you think so?
Of course, sure thing. Exactly.
Yeah. - Yeah.
Ok, then...
"Good bye"
Oh, yeah "Good Bye"...
Excuse me...
Here comes my commercial.
"Come to Taverna Bouzouki
58 Susanna Street
Tasty meals, budget prices...
just like in Greece
Fresh, healthy and tasty...
and budget prices. Great food, tasty Greek food...
at Taverna Bouzouki
good food from the real Greek Kitchen.
58 Susanna Street
The food is good, everything is good..."
"Shanghai Joey?
Who wants to know?
My finger on the trigger...
What's your last words?
Don't you ever do this to someone with a heartache.
All for a dumb girl...
I hope it was worth this Joey!
So do I.
KING of KEBAB We'd die for Doner!"
Ah?
A cup closed in my true love's hand? Poison I see hath been his timeless end.
You are not giving an autopsy report; "it was poison sir"
You just realize that your lover had killed himself...
Poison I see hath been his timeless end?
Have you ever lost something that was truly important to you?
My hamster died...
it's been a few years, his name was Charlie.
Then think of Charlie...
Why are you crying now?
You never knew Charlie...
I'm always thinking of Ibo...
I better give him a call,
before he kills himself, too.
But, Charlie didn't kill himself.
Could you present wrap this please?
Would you like a drink? - Not yet, I'm waiting for some one, thank you.
Would you like something now? - Yes, the big menu please.
and a glass of water...
with lemon... Thank you.
Hey Titzi.
If only you knew what happened today. - I'm listening...
I was skating towards the restaurant like had been kicked by a donkey...
My lungs are screaming "AIR" my muscles are burning like fire...
There's only one thought in my mind... "Titzi is waiting, Titzi is waiting..."
Then, all of a sudden, BAM!
This producer hits me with his car!
I fly face down... Everything spins around...
I get up and crawl forward...
I forget about my pain, all I think is "Titzi is waiting, Titzi is waiting..."
The present I got for you... Destroyed...
The producer grabs my arm, he really wants to speak with me...
"Ibo your commercial is really good"
A little dark and spooky.
"You're the greatest" but I'm not even listening to him. - We need to talk
Not now, 'cause... Do you know my girl friend?
Do you want to ruin my life? I want to go!
My only desire is to get to you...
Aren't you this great cinema director?
Yeah...
I'm an actress with no work. My talent is just being wasted.
The next leading role is already given.
Are you pregnant?
Are you nuts?
Piss off...
How am I going to order now?
Forget it, anyway...
My skateboard was ruined, the guy just drove over it...
First I fixed my skateboard, then off like a lightning "Titzi is waiting"
Just when nothing ever could stop me, suddenly...
uncle Ahmet jumps in front of me...
Ibo, check this out... Ibrahim... - "I'm really late" but he still...
wanted to talk about the next project. - The place is full of depressed people.
Of course this wouldn't stop me. - Nobody is eating anything.
These people drink a cup of tea in two hours, they mess up the place...
I said "Uncle, serve better food" and took off like a lightning. Believe me Titzi...
I did everything to get here on time.
Ok, Ibo.
You are an hour late and I've been thinking for an hour.
I understand you.
You understand me? - Yes.
I wonder how I would play a Turk having a baby from a German girl?
I put myself in your position and now I understand.
Yes, actually my dad... - Your dad is an excuse...
If your dad forbid you to make movies, would you listen to him?
Your dad is just an excuse, Ibo,
if it wasn't your dad then it would be your films...
Francis Ford Coppola had three children when he made "Apocalypse Now".
Yes, but this...
Do you want me to tell you why you don't want to have a child?
You are scared!
I don't know who's head you got into, miss...
but it's surely not mine... "Scared"...
I'm scared, too.
Actually more scared, the reason is, my body is changing...
I'm going to give birth to our child, I'm going to suffer, not you...
All I need is you to be with me, I need to be able to trust you.
I need someone that has no excuses, someone strong and trustworthy...
a rock to lean on...
I need different Ibo.
What is that supposed to mean?
Be a good father, learn and show me... or leave us alone...
Thank you, for letting me learn...
Thank Valid.
I can understand why your girlfriend left you.
She didn't leave me, she...
Things getting serious, Ibo,
the alarm went off.
Think of the worst smell in the world,
now multiply that by 7! - Multiply by 7...
Are you ready? - I'm ready...
and we begin... - Ok...
This one is a 9.8 on the scale and the nappy is still on.
Now, there are three very important things, Ibo;
Don't breath in too deep! Think of Soccer! Don't Panic!
Ok, get some good photos or she won't believe me.
Could you lean down a bit?
A bit more, just a bit...
Closer Ibo... - Dude... - A bit more...
You're doing this for Titzi... Doing this for Titzi...
Don't worry, we'll wait half an hour. Next time you'll be better prepared.
How did it go, Ibo?
Ibo... you have shit on your ear.
Yeah, I know.
Can I take a shower? I mean for about two weeks...
I give up, really.
I'm going to go get beer.
You were going an hour ago.
I needed to gain speed first.
I mean physically and emotionally... and physically!
January
February
DESPERADO Film production Gone to Berlin film festival.
Did you go?
What?
To go get beer!
March
You should make up, I still want to be a baby sitter, 5 Euros an hour.
I don't know, what do you think?
Shit, I forgot.
Damn, what are we going to do now?
April
Yippee
Titzi! I made it! - Very good.
I got it,
you can go again...
May
When?
Now.
"Inspiration"
Hey, Titzi!
Stop!
Bruce Lee?
Get up!
What are you doing here? - What are you doing here?
I got hit by something... - That was...
...my foot.
But why Sansai? - You need inspiration.
Why aren't you with your girlfriend?
I don't know if I can be a good father.
What should I do master?
Every step you take upwards, will make the mountain smaller.
Every step you take towards the top, will melt the mountain beneath your feet.
You mean I should start climbing? - No, douchebag...
You must show her that you are a man.
Go join a prenatal course.
Breathe in...
...and out
Breathe in...
...and out.
Thank you.
Mr. Ibo Sechmez?
Yes. - Welcome.
Would you kindly introduce yourself to the group, no need to be shy.
We are a bit confused, we've had women without men but never a man without a woman.
This, is my friend.
Ok, then just come sit in the middle.
Yes...
Actually, Bruce Lee encouraged me to come...
A short while ago my wife left me and she did this
because of a stock broker called Joachim.
My wife is 8 months pregnant and she doesn't want the child, she wants a divorce.
Since I will be raising the child by myself, I need to learn about these things.
I mean, I need to know what to do.
Yes, but your wife is giving birth right?
Yes.
That's how mother nature dictates.
Then your friend should lie down.
who, me?
Coming! Coming! Triplets coming! Triplets coming!
What is your son doing? Is he still with that German girl?
I forbade him. - Good.
Did he understand this wise decision?
We're not speaking, I kicked him out.
Very good.
That's what you call a strong man.
Hello...
Oh, hello... - Let me... - No I'll carry.
No, no, no... - I'll Carry - Give them to me.
Did you hear from Ibrahim? - I got a letter from him today.
"We confirm that Mr. Ibrahim Sechmez has successfully completed the prenatal course."
Donkey, son of a donkey! - Pardon?
I said "Donkey, son of a donkey"
Is this for?
Yes.
Does it fold? - Yes.
Here some where...
May I?
There... - Wow, you're a pro. - Ayla had one like this.
If you ever need help...
then...
Good bye.
Hello? Hello?
Come...
Hi! - Hi...
Thank you.
Uncle Ahmet invited us today. It's his birthday.
Do you have to go now then? - No,
I want you to come, too. You're family now.
I don't know Ayla. - Please, please...
Your father wouldn't want me there. Ibo would be there too, right?
Ibo is better now, I taught him how to cook baby food
without burning the pot. Super isn't it? - Great.
Ibo is missing you, Come, ok?
I hate birthdays.
They fill up on free food then ask "How's business?"
At the end of the month, tax max, insurance minsurance... Fuck...
What? - Smile uncle, smile, you can't cancel now.
Are you trying to destroy me?
These testicles are enough for a month's supply. - This is tripe, I need the testicles for
something else. Where there is good food, people eat more food.
Cook good food? Eat more food?
You moron, it's just relatives coming today.
Happy birthday. I need to speak with you.
I need to speak with you, too. - Ok, but I need a Doner first.
What's up? Did you get a health inspection?
I said I'm hungry! Aren't you going to give me a Doner?
Let's talk first.
Last ad was shit. people won't buy anything. I want a new one.
When will you make a new one for me? - A new one eh? Let me think.
I know... I think...
Oh, hello, what would you?
Shut up! You know what we want...
Pussy...
Sit down and shut up. We'll talk in a second.
Here we are, three tripe soup, beautiful...
Ahmet!
What a shitty soup! - No garlic - No tripe...
This is just water! - Horrible taste!
From now on you're going to have to pay for protection every month.
Protection? From who? - Nuts like us! - That's enough!
We're having an important discussion and we don't want to be disturbed.
Nicely, sit and drink your soup without breathing!
We'll be back...
Next time round, I'm going to use your balls to make tripe soup.
Pussy.
We showed them didn't we...
The assholes are right about one thing; the tripe soup used to be better.
Can't you just shut up? Who's going to pay for all this?
Last ad was crap, I want a new one! No Blood!
No Guns! Just cheerful, healthy people with appetite!
Get someone else, I'm an artist with vision! - I have vision!
I see a shop full of customers! - Ibo, dude...
your last ad was really crap. - Are you a critic now?
Yes or yes? - No!
Aren't you going to give me a Doner? - No!
Ok, have fun tonight. I'll be eating Greek from now on.
Greek?
I'll fuck you like a Greek!
Say something son! - Traitor - Get up!
Yell! - Traitor!
Your father was right to kick you out! - Traitor!
Oooh, the famous Ibo Sechmez! Famous director!
In my humble restaurant!
My lovely young one... Come...
Hello... Ibo...
Mmmm, yummy...
I have to confess, Ibo...
Whenever you walk down the street, I check you out from behind,
and I'd like to bite your rock hard ass!
Are you shocked? - No.
Bottoms up.
Cheers.
Ibo will come.
Uncle!
What is it?
Ouzo! - Ouzo!
I better get going... - No.
Why not?
My girlfriend and I... I mean I tried.
I went to the prenatal course, read books and thought...
I wonder if I came to that point?
No.
I'll tell you a secret, Ibo...
You'll never get to that point. You're not made for that...
I'm saying the same thing from the start.
There are men that want more from life, leaders, geniuses,
revolutionarys, Julius Ceasar or men like Dieter Bohlen.
You can't cage men like that. You can't put you in a cage, Ibo!
Exactly! That's exactly right!
Ouzo!
Oh, uncle...
Tell me, how do you like my place?
Great - Isn't it...
A little empty...
...isn't it...
I'll make an ad for you so it doesn't stay like this.
Ouz! - Shut it!
Say that again?
I'll make an ad for you so it doesn't stay like this.
OUZOOOOOOOO!!!
Time to dance!
OUZO!!!
I'll never get to tat point! NEVER!
I'm Julius Ceasar!
Stella, get in...
Hi...
Hey guys... Listen
Stay away from Ouzo! It kills you, it destroys you.
I don't remember a thing about last night.
What happened last night?
Give me Titzi!
Nadine, I'm begging you!
She's not home.
Nadine, please, I need to speak with her. - She doesn't want to see you.
Hey, Nadine! - Everything ok? - For now...
Nadine, please...
Come, night, thou sober-suited matron all in black. Hood my unmanned blood, bating in my cheeks.
Till strange love grow bold,
Think true love acted simple modesty.
Come, night,
come, Romeo.
This is the first time I saw Juliet pregnant. Gave the part a new feel.
Very good. - Thank you.
You know you can't attend with your baby, right? - Why not?
We had bad experiences with young mothers. Most crumble under the weight,
and their education gets damaged. Wait a year or two.
Your baby... - No, I don't want to wait a year or two,
I want to learn and act now.
You are talented, but with your belly
applauding you will take courage. One gets scared that...
you might start contracting. Why won't you wait? - Cause my soul is burning.
I want my child to love theatre as much as I do.
I'm too young to wait.
So, did I pass?
Congratulations. - Thank you. - Bye.
No, no!
No!
Yes, yes yes...
My wife had my son in the car, I just changed the seat covers.
My god...
What have I done to you?
Get an ambulance...
You'll be in an ambulance if you don't take me. - No!
Yes! - No!
Come...
...come.
HEY WAIT FOR ME!
Boy or girl? - I don't know.
Which would you prefer? - Makes no difference to me.
No difference? - I just want it to be born.
Oh no, not again...
Shit!
Salam Aleykum.
Aleykum Salam.
All doctors here!
I'm scared. - Most important to breathe right.
All doctors here! Are you injured?
I'm pregnant...
Are you the father?
He's the grandpa - Yes, grandpa.
Can someone shut that shitty dolphin song?
Hey, Titzi.
What are you doing here? - What am I doing here?
I'm doing your job! Why aren't you with your wife?
GET OUT!
Both of you!
Smoke your cigarette here.
I can't smoke in front of you.
Respect has nothing to do with smoking, I said have it here.
I never smoked in front of you. - Smoke.
Give me one, too.
Dad... - Yes?
How can I be a good father?
Ask your child, not your father...
Donkey, son of a donkey.
The baby is born.
Boy? - Girl.
I have a girl...
You gave me a grandchild.
Truly...
it was all because of Ouzo.
You were a real jerk.
Yeah, I know.
My baby?
Man, it is...
I haven't forgiven you...
Two stars up on the sky briefly left their spot for a while
they asked your eyes to shine in their place,
but if your eyes would go and the stars come down to your face,
the shine from your cheeks would embarrass the stars
just like the sun would embarrass a candle light.
Oh, those starry eyes.
hang on...
oh yeah, starry eyes...
shine up in the sky
and singing birds would think it was never night.
Look at how she's touching her cheek.
I wish I could be a glove
on her hand and touch her cheek.
Titzi, I...
saw you at the exam.
Things you said there... - Shhh...
You can do this uncle.
This is my son!
Yes, for the last 25 years.
Not bad, eh? - Edible
What are you doing here?
We want to make the first German Kung Fu movie with you.
I saw your commercial, too. But the script...
...needs a motivation. - But you have to be patient.
This year I'm using my baby leave.
Don't worry, in that time we'll fix the script.
You see man, it's possible...
Oh, shit!
I haven't invited assholes to my wedding. - This is not a wedding, this is a funeral.
Any last words, huh?
and... ACTION!
Doner Deluxe, only 3.50 €
Fruit salad "Macedonia", only 3.- €
Stuffed leaves "Ahmed", only 3.- €
Stuffed leaves "Kirianis", only 3.- €
Grill, 1 Person 6.50 € 2 People 9.50 €, 3 People 11.50 €
Ah... Asshole.
Hey, guys...
The tripe soup tastes good again.
Tripe Soup, only 2.50 €
Say "daddy"
daddy
dad-dy - Do-ner
Sub titles Sigh-Fye